Plastic surgery
I have been reading a blog a lot lately, called Penelope Trunk’s Brazen Careerist, where Ms Trunk, a middle-aged single mom, talks about the work world, interspersed with her personal sex stories and anecdotes. I love it. There’s one post in particular that got my brain working lately: in it she half-defends plastic surgery on the basis that women are discriminated against for their age, far more extensively than men do.
Off the cuff arguments supporting this: men, when they get grey hair start getting called “silver foxes”; aging men are referred to as more “sophisticated” looking; aging women wearing the same amount of make-up as they did when they were going to studio 54 look like clowns (they look even more ridiculous in their mini-skirts)… By no meas is this list exhaustive, but I’m not willing to devote essay-writing-amounts of time to a blog entry.
Let’s take women’s dressing up first: women wearing make-up is a social construct that is entirely unnecessary on a primal level – this has clearly become a moot point in our society (those lucky enough to be able to get away with not wearing any make-up do not apply) (also, remember when so many social constructs and taboos really make absolutely no sense at all? I was thinking this weekend about how it’s such a huge bummer that one of the most fun and exciting, and fulfilling and healthy and natural acts is vilified – especially for women. I mean, who the hell decided sex wasn’t “cool” socially and further, made it a political issue??? Jesus, I’d like to go back in time and smack some people around…). Remember how males from other species (e.g.: peacocks) are the ones who dress themselves up? How did we get screwed out of the deal? Further, how did we get convinced that we like it? I’ll be the first to admit, I like looking good. I like having sweet colours in my eye shadow and coordinating that with my outfits, I like wearing heels once in a while and skirts all of the time. I’ll also be the first to admit that I think the standards of beauty are ridiculous and vestigial remnants of a species worried about its propagation. Just a guess, but it doesn’t seem to be a concern anymore, but I still can’t get rid of the skirts. I digress… There just comes a time in women’s lives where they’re expected to put away the mini and pick up the leisure suit. Is it because of the spider veins on their legs? Is there a reason that elastic waistbands become the standard uniform for old ladies, whereas men can continue to don their fedoras and suits sans problème? Post-menopausal women get screwed in the fashion game, while tweed and elbow pads are making a comeback. Where’s the justice?
Men who age with crow’s feet look adorable and like they smile a lot, as if smiling’s a rarity among males. Women with crow’s feet? Have you seen eye creams in the stores? They are hella expensive – who thinks it’s a good idea o drop 30$ on a tube only large enough to hold a baby’s nose, full of grease to slop around your eyes before you go to sleep?
Now, as far as principle goes, I am 100% against this idea. I think it’s abhorrent to think that women should take on the brunt of caring for our appearances, but emotionally and monetarily. This goes much further than simply aging though: eating disorders are another issue that just goes beyond this scope (90% of anorexia sufferers are female, according to a quick look on wikipedia). Regardless, I feel this is one issue where I can’t even really take a stand. It might sound cowardly, but I admit to wanting to look good, and I admit to not having the guts to say fuck it, and letting my armpit hair grow out, though on principle, I think everyone should, just to say a big “fuck you” to the whole perpetuating system. Unfortunately, I am concerned with how people see me (thought arguably less than most people, I would like to think), but I am concerned with getting laid, and further, I am aware that these things make a difference – it’s like eating placenta. I think it’s fucking disgusting, to be perfectly honest, but I would like to not think that. I would like to think that it’s a naturally occurring thing: cows and horses do it, why can’t I? Cuz it’s gross, that’s why. Maybe that’s social convention telling me to think that, but I know my social conventions, being in the punk scene, are slightly more accepting of certain things, and I still can’t get behind that.
All of that digression to say this: I can’t agree with being cool with having plastic surgery in order to guarantee, or maintain a professional position, but I understand why someone would do it. I despise feeling helpless against social conventions, but this is one of them I can’t tear down. I would be a hypocrite if I did, considering my own hang-ups, and the way I’m willing to treat myself and my body in order to attain ridiculous goals. I can be fairly certain that I won’t be one of those in line for a face lift, at least, but with this, like with vegetarianism, I have a hard time accepting some and not all (if you’re vegetarian but you still eat cheese and it’s for any reason other than simply not liking meat – animal rights, hormones, environmental concerns etc… – you’re an idiot: you’re still taking part in the system by partaking at all in their products, you’re still getting the hormones from the milk, you’re still contributing to global warming by drinking the milk made by cows that take up valuable farmland, and besides, the conditions in which milk cows and hens live are deplorable. Take a full stand or none at all.).
Further, I know I have a bias in this, in that I don’t ever plan on having the sort of position where this would matter – I’m already well on my way to covering myself in tattoos, so physical appearance in reference to job positions isn’t anything that concerns me – it’s already fucked. Maybe if I were into getting into a fortune 500 company, this would be an issue.
In any case, I might sound like I’m being pretty black and white about it, but in fact, I’m not. Something about old age makes me really psyched to be able to see different issues and empathize with those who see them differently than I do. But something that sucks about old age is seeing that the idealism that I had as a teenager was cool and all, but there are some things that I can’t personally change, as hard as I might try. And I will continue to try, with the people that surround me, but that is all that I can do, and hope that that small contribution aids in the long run, cuz time and globally drastic circumstances (or heavy lobbying and a tonne of money) are the only things that can change social conventions.
My apologies for the messy way this is written – I am trying to get back into writing at all, and having a seriously difficult time with my non-usage of English ever in real life.
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